Customers never seem to be pleased. They always want more, right? Why is that? I’ll tell you why.

Everyone knows the “golden rule,” which comes out of the bible in the book of Matthew:

So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you, for this sums up the Law and the Prophets. Matthew 7:12

So we treat other people the way we ourselves want to be treated. And that is the problem.

We miss the point of the Golden Rule.

In a nut-shell, the problem is that we turn this into a “tactic” instead of keeping it as a “strategy.” A tactic is a small action, where a strategy is a big-picture goal.

For example, a tactical response to the Golden Rule would be something like this: I desire a blue fish. Therefore, I will give someone else a blue fish. Then they will know that I want a blue fish in return.

Sounds silly, doesn’t it? But that is exactly what we are doing to our customers, and why they never seem to be satisfied with what we do for them.

I had a customer ask me a question this morning. He wanted a “simple” answer. The problem is, that I myself am the type of person who doesn’t want a “simple” answer. I want a “complete” answer. And because I want a complete answer, I don’t always trust a “simple” answer. I also want to be directed to additional information where I can dig deep to find the complete answer. That way I’ll know under what conditions the simple answer works, and when the simple answer breaks down and I’ll need to find a different solution.

So my response to the customer was to point him to the place where he could get a “complete” answer to his technical question.

In other words, I treated him the way that I myself would have wanted to be treated. I gave him a blue fish, when he wanted a piece of paper. They are totally different!

It was no surprise that he came back to me and repeated the question using different words, in hopes that I would understand what HE wanted.

That is our problem, we take a big-picture rule, and we turn it into a tactical situation.

On the other side is the BIG picture. The strategy.


The strategy of the Golden Rule is this: Treat NICE. Not “nice” by your definition, but by theirs’.

I’m sure you’ve heard of the phrase “Men are from Mars, Woman are from Venus.” What that means is that each gender has different desires. Men want their woman to treat them sexually. Women what their men to treat them emotionally. There is a big divide between the two things, so it is no wonder that there is friction in the household. The women are treating their men the way they want to be treated: emotionally. And vise-versa for the men.

Whether we’re talking about our spouses or our customers, we are not finding out how the other person wants to be treated. In other words, we are not searching for their real desire. Instead, we are projecting on to them our desires of how we want to be treated.

What we have done is to turn the Golden Rule into a tactic, and not kept it as a strategy.

How Do We Fix This?

It is simple in theory. To fix it, we have to find out what the other person considers as their definition of “treat nice.”

However, it is harder to do in reality, because we are always looking at the other people through our own glasses, not theirs.

This is where the Personality Marketing Manual comes in handy. In fact, it is priceless. The reason is that it tells us what the other person considers as “nice.”

As we talked about before, there are four types of personality temperaments, and each one has a different idea of how they’d like to be treated. For example, we know what things make them happy, and what irritates them.

Once we know what they want that makes them happy, then we can finally give it to them. And most importantly, in the way that they want to receive it.

To get your own copy of the Personality Marketing Manual, visit: You will be glad you did, as the information is priceless. It is almost like having a brain-wave detector, where you can know exactly what they are thinking. Just imagine how well you’ll be able to please them and give them exactly what they want.

Once they have got what they want, then as the Golden Rule dictates, they will want to treat you with what you desire. Maybe that is money. Maybe it is gratitude. Whatever your definition of nice is, I’m sure that they’ll give it right back to you. Cool, huh?

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